OKC Legal Briefs: April 10, 2008

Journal Record, The (Oklahoma City), Apr 10, 2008 by Marie Price

FEMA has "won" a Muzzle Award from a group that monitors First Amendment goofs.

Yes, those fine folks who brought seamless, quality assistance to Gulf Coast hurricane victims in 2005 were lauded by the Thomas Jefferson Center for the Protection of Free Expression for their cute little bogus press conference in October of last year.

The agency had its own employees act as reporters, lobbing softball questions about assistance for California wildfire victims at FEMA's deputy director. Real reporters could not ask questions at the "listen only" conference call.

Even Homeland Security Director Michael Chertoff, who oversees FEMA, termed the stunt one of the dumbest things he's seen since he's been in government.

The Associated Press reported that other Muzzle honorees include a Lifetime Award for the FCC, for instances such as its strict definition of broadcast indecency in situations such as Janet Jackson's 2004 Super Bowl "wardrobe malfunction." The regulatory agency has been in the running just about every year of the awards' 17-year history.

Also targeted with Muzzles were a Nebraska county judge for banning witnesses from using terms such as "rape" and "victim" during a trial, and U.S. Sen. Jay Rockefeller, D-W.Va., for filing legislation that would require the FCC to adopt a policy making broadcasting one word or image punishable as indecent.

Scalia 'not a nut'

U.S. Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia told Roger Williams University Law School students this week that he would face difficulty being confirmed today, because the "original intent" constitutional interpretation he follows has fallen into disfavor.

Scalia won unanimous confirmation to the nation's highest court in 1986.

He said the most important criterion now is whether a nominee will "write the new constitution that you like."

"I am a textualist," Scalia told the students. "I am an originalist. I am not a nut."

Assault by hedgehog

New Zealander William Singalargh has been charged with assault with a weapon for lobbing a spiky hedgehog several yards and hitting a 15-year-old boy, causing red welts and puncture marks.

The animal's mid-air condition was not known, but it was reportedly dead when police collected it as evidence.

The maximum penalty for assault by a weapon is five years imprisonment.

A police sergeant noted that while people are frequently charged with assault for whipping things at each other, using a hedgehog is not seen very often.

Here's a new twist

Call it "woman bites dog that bit dog."

A Minneapolis woman's Labrador retriever, Ella, was recently attacked by a pit bull that jumped a fence.

Fearing for Ella's life, Amy Rice first tried to pull open the pit bull's jaws, to no avail.

Without thinking, the anxious pet owner bit the aggressor on the nose, hard enough that she tasted blood in her mouth.

The pit bull was quarantined for rabies tests.

Rice said her dog suffered a crushed ear canal and received staples and stitches to seal head wounds.

Case of the slipping halos?

A Lyndonville, N.Y., pastor has some 'splaining to do.

Craig Rhodenizer's wife reported him as missing after he disappeared on a supposed trip to Best Buy to get his computer fixed.

New York law enforcement and the FBI launched a search for the reverend.

Rhodenizer's car was recently found at an Ohio strip club, the K.C. Lounge.

A police detective termed the confronted Rhodenizer disoriented and self-described as "emotionally guilty."

Meanwhile, in another part of the forest ...

A former Pennsylvania pastor pleaded guilty recently to using church members' personal data to obtain credit cards.

Rev. Raymond Clayton, 43, copped to a charge of access device fraud, and awaits sentencing.

His attorney said that Clayton has agreed to a plea agreement calling for a year in jail, plus restitution.