Utah's line of defense

0 Comments | Deseret News (Salt Lake City), May 8, 2003 | by Dick HarmonDeseret News sports columnist

Here's Utah's coalition of sports weapons of the past year:

The 82nd Airborne: Andrei Kirilenko, a man upon whom gravity lost a grip for fragmented seconds at a time.

MOAB (Massive Ordnance Air Blast): Ute tackle Jordan Gross, first offensive lineman taken in the NFL draft. Couldn't golf a lick, but he could bring tacklers to their collective knees.

Hellfire Air-to-Surface Missile: Ute Marc Jackson. Late departure news aside, the Utah reserve guard certainly led his team to an MWC championship and was the ultimate bomb.

Daisy Cutter 15,000-pound Bomb: Cougar sharpshooter Mark Bigelow. When the dude was on, he certainly was a get-a-run-going kinda guy.

M2A3 Bradley Fighting Machine: The legendary John Stockton in all his ambidextrous glory. Whether desert, highway, hiking path or the hardwoods, the man in little shorts did a yeoman's job.

GBU Laser-guided Bomb: Nick Jacobson, a stationary Utah launcher if you ever saw one.

GBU Bunker Buster: Down low and on fire, it had to be Weber State guard Jermaine Boyette. He got down and dirty against nearly everyone.

Stinger Anti-aircraft Missile: Stew Morrell gave the Aggies a great run and with a better NCAA seed, USU could have set the sting on some people.

Maverick Air-to-Surface Missiles: Steve Cleveland and Joe Cravens - - seasons that ran past good into almost great.

The Humvee: Rick Majerus, tough to turn upside down.

M109A6 Paladin Howitzer: Greg Ostertag. Don't laugh. For a couple of games late this season, he provided visions of somebody else in that body and it looked mighty good.

Patriot Missile: Kevin Curtis, Utah State's fleet-footed receiver who will make a name for himself on Sundays.

Light Armored Vehicle: Reno Mahe. You may catch him, but he usually made about four guys look like silly putty in misses.

AS 90 Braveheart Howitzer: Rafael Araujo. In one season of Division I, the BYU center gave a glimpse of some major league talent.

Striker Anti-armor Vehicle: Bronco Mendenhall. Seen enough in spring to see the virtue of the BYU defensive coordinator hire.

Warrior Combat Vehicle: Kyle Whittingham. The solid, consistent author of Utah's defense.

Scimitar Recon Vehicle: Jerry Sloan. Should have been coach of the year and would have garnered that if somebody had dropped Tim Duncan in his lap for a late run. Or, he coached in Los Angeles or New York.

Hercules Recovery Vehicle: Gotta be BYU cornerback Brandon Heaney and his greased popping limb.

M1A1 Abrams Battle Tank: Karl Malone. Karl's gotta do what Karl's gotta do in days to come but he is the franchise's mobile artillery.

Tomahawk Cruise Missile: Travis Hansen, the Cougar utility player whose defense, hustle and all-around game took BYU past the prognosticators' picks. He had his game honed all season.

Saxon Armored Personnel Carrier: Lance Rice. Tough to lose a job in a stadium that carries your family name. Class instead of casualty.

Challenger II Battle Tank: Bret Engemann, like the British in Basra. You'd like to see what he could do with more duty in those halves at Georgia Tech, Nevada and Air Force.

Avenger Humvee: Ron McBride. Will his loyal followers be as faithful in watching him work at Kentucky?

M2270 Multiple Launch Rocket System: Gary Crowton and his use of Engemann, Lance Pendleton, Todd Mortensen and Matt Berry.

Simple Grenade: Ute quarterback Brett Elliott. Maybe he'll link up with a launcher and do some damage someday.

SA-80 Rifle: Matt Berry. Maybe he'll link up with some receivers and do some damage someday.

HARM Anti-radar Missile: Curtis Borchardt. Maybe he'll find some miracle calcium cure for bones and be healthy one day.

Gas Masks: DeShawn Stevenson, Scott Padgett and John Amaechi. Maybe they'll be used/needed one day.

E-mail: dharmon@desnews.com

Copyright C 2003 Deseret News Publishing Co.
Provided by ProQuest Information and Learning Company. All rights Reserved.
 

BNET TalkbackShare your ideas and expertise on this topic

Please add your comment:

  1. You are currently: a Guest |
  2.  

Basic HTML tags that work in comments are: bold (<b></b>), italic (<i></i>), underline (<u></u>), and hyperlink (<a href></a)