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Utah's line of defense
0 Comments | Deseret News (Salt Lake City), May 8, 2003 | by Dick HarmonDeseret News sports columnist
Here's Utah's coalition of sports weapons of the past year:
The 82nd Airborne: Andrei Kirilenko, a man upon whom gravity lost a grip for fragmented seconds at a time.
MOAB (Massive Ordnance Air Blast): Ute tackle Jordan Gross, first offensive lineman taken in the NFL draft. Couldn't golf a lick, but he could bring tacklers to their collective knees.
Hellfire Air-to-Surface Missile: Ute Marc Jackson. Late departure news aside, the Utah reserve guard certainly led his team to an MWC championship and was the ultimate bomb.
Daisy Cutter 15,000-pound Bomb: Cougar sharpshooter Mark Bigelow. When the dude was on, he certainly was a get-a-run-going kinda guy.
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M2A3 Bradley Fighting Machine: The legendary John Stockton in all his ambidextrous glory. Whether desert, highway, hiking path or the hardwoods, the man in little shorts did a yeoman's job.
GBU Laser-guided Bomb: Nick Jacobson, a stationary Utah launcher if you ever saw one.
GBU Bunker Buster: Down low and on fire, it had to be Weber State guard Jermaine Boyette. He got down and dirty against nearly everyone.
Stinger Anti-aircraft Missile: Stew Morrell gave the Aggies a great run and with a better NCAA seed, USU could have set the sting on some people.
Maverick Air-to-Surface Missiles: Steve Cleveland and Joe Cravens - - seasons that ran past good into almost great.
The Humvee: Rick Majerus, tough to turn upside down.
M109A6 Paladin Howitzer: Greg Ostertag. Don't laugh. For a couple of games late this season, he provided visions of somebody else in that body and it looked mighty good.
Patriot Missile: Kevin Curtis, Utah State's fleet-footed receiver who will make a name for himself on Sundays.
Light Armored Vehicle: Reno Mahe. You may catch him, but he usually made about four guys look like silly putty in misses.
AS 90 Braveheart Howitzer: Rafael Araujo. In one season of Division I, the BYU center gave a glimpse of some major league talent.
Striker Anti-armor Vehicle: Bronco Mendenhall. Seen enough in spring to see the virtue of the BYU defensive coordinator hire.
Warrior Combat Vehicle: Kyle Whittingham. The solid, consistent author of Utah's defense.
Scimitar Recon Vehicle: Jerry Sloan. Should have been coach of the year and would have garnered that if somebody had dropped Tim Duncan in his lap for a late run. Or, he coached in Los Angeles or New York.
Hercules Recovery Vehicle: Gotta be BYU cornerback Brandon Heaney and his greased popping limb.
M1A1 Abrams Battle Tank: Karl Malone. Karl's gotta do what Karl's gotta do in days to come but he is the franchise's mobile artillery.
Tomahawk Cruise Missile: Travis Hansen, the Cougar utility player whose defense, hustle and all-around game took BYU past the prognosticators' picks. He had his game honed all season.
Saxon Armored Personnel Carrier: Lance Rice. Tough to lose a job in a stadium that carries your family name. Class instead of casualty.
Challenger II Battle Tank: Bret Engemann, like the British in Basra. You'd like to see what he could do with more duty in those halves at Georgia Tech, Nevada and Air Force.
Avenger Humvee: Ron McBride. Will his loyal followers be as faithful in watching him work at Kentucky?
M2270 Multiple Launch Rocket System: Gary Crowton and his use of Engemann, Lance Pendleton, Todd Mortensen and Matt Berry.
Simple Grenade: Ute quarterback Brett Elliott. Maybe he'll link up with a launcher and do some damage someday.
SA-80 Rifle: Matt Berry. Maybe he'll link up with some receivers and do some damage someday.
HARM Anti-radar Missile: Curtis Borchardt. Maybe he'll find some miracle calcium cure for bones and be healthy one day.
Gas Masks: DeShawn Stevenson, Scott Padgett and John Amaechi. Maybe they'll be used/needed one day.
E-mail: dharmon@desnews.com
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