Marriage wows: The best-made wedding plans will get a good reception

Deseret News (Salt Lake City), Jun 19, 2003 by Susan Whitney Deseret Morning News

Tying the knot? Deseret Morning News staff writer Susan Whitney profiles a few unusual ways to say "I do" and passes along advice from pros, parents and couples themselves on what to do and what not to do when you're planning your wedding festivities.

Getting hitched

So what if one of the horses sneezed a few times during the ceremony. Misty Lupus and Travis Bleak couldn't have had a more perfect wedding.

Carrie Cannon and Kris Baughman say the same thing about their wedding. Not only was it perfect, it was perfect for them.

Cannon began by planning a traditional wedding. She figured they'd say their vows and greet their guests at a reception center. But as she waved one reception center brochure after another before Kris' eyes, she says, "he would try to show interest, but basically, he was like, 'whatever.'

"And I didn't want this to be just my thing."

So one day she asked him, "If money were no object, if you could get married anywhere in the world, where would you want to get married?" And Baughman, who sells mountain bikes and loves to ride them, said, "the Moab Rim."

Her family was agreeable to the idea. And when Cannon called Baughman's mom, her future mother-in-law eagerly set to work on the project. She called the chairlift operators and made arrangements. She did all the invitations. "I had veto power," Cannon says. She couldn't have been happier with her mother-in-law's help. "She was amazing."

Cannon will never forget when, after the ceremony, she turned around and saw a mountainside covered in smiling guests.

As for Lupus, she and Bleak planned to get married in Las Vegas. But then her aunt, knowing they were both horse trainers and had met through horses, offered them the use of her arena.

Three weeks before their wedding day, they completely changed their plans. Lupus says they needed help from everyone. Not only did her aunt give them a place for the wedding, she also arranged for a wagon and a team to transport the grandparents to the ceremony. Lupus' mom made the cake.

The groom, meanwhile, had been breaking horses for Reed Workman. He arranged for Workman's wife, Nancy, who happens to be the mayor of Salt Lake County, to perform the ceremony.

Lupus is sure a lot more people came to see them get married on horseback in Lindon, Utah, than would have come to Las Vegas. People came from as far away as Roosevelt and Ogden.

When you choose a place that has significance for you, it will probably have significance for your family and friends as well, says Cannon. Most of those who came to their wedding knew that Baughman had won the first free-ride competition ever held there. "A couple of people were nervous about riding the lift," Cannon adds. "They were afraid of heights." But they did it.

The couple's mountain-biking friends were not among the fearful. They brought their bikes up the lift with them. They wore their best clothes for the ceremony and after it was over, they went into the restrooms and changed into biking shorts and downhill armor. Then, gleefully, they took off down the race course on the back side of the mountain.

Motherly advice

Sandy and Preston Miller have three daughters. Back in 1999, when the first one got engaged, the Millers were out with friends who had already had children get married. "How much does a wedding cost?" asked Preston Miller. "About $2,000?"

The friends laughed.

Actually, says Sandy Miller, for a traditional, formal wedding, you will likely spend closer to $10,000.

By the time her second daughter got engaged, Miller knew the drill. "The first thing to do is decide where you want to have it. You have to reserve a place." You have to take into account your budget, she says, and also the wishes of the bride and groom.

Both her daughters were married in an LDS Temple. Both had definite ideas about a reception. Her first-born, Nicole, had always wanted a small family dinner at the Salt Lake Country Club. Her second daughter, Lauren, knew she wanted an outdoor reception. The Millers were able to arrange for one at a new condominium complex.

Sandy Miller wishes someone had told her that you need to assign a relative to hang out with the photographer. At her first daughter's wedding, the photographer didn't know Miller's brother. As a result, she has no photo of the bride's uncle, who drove all the way from Arizona to be there. At her second daughter's wedding, Miller had her sister point out the people to photograph.

Get help wherever you can, she advises. At each reception, she assigned her mother and aunt to arrive early and set up a display of the couple's china. She hired her neighbor to do the flowers.

Another tip: Miller convinced her daughters to schedule their temple weddings for the early afternoon. "We didn't have to get up at 6 a.m. to get our hair done." Instead, the beautician came to their home and worked on mom, bride and bridesmaids in one big party. Other advantages to a later wedding: The bride doesn't have to change out of her dress then back into it for the reception. And the entire family appreciates not having to put in an 18-hour day.